“INFATUATION”A VENOM TO LOVE.
Many people are ignorant of the word “infatuation”. Most young people are victims of this inflammation in relationship. Many people think they are in love while infatuation is eating up their hearts. What is infatuation?
Infatuation according to the Oxford Advanced Learner’s Dictionary means “very strong feelings of love or attraction for somebody, especially when these are unreasonable and do not last long”. It is an irrational love or desire. It is a blind love. Sometimes its experience can be real and excited but it does not last. Its victims are left empty at the end.
When love relies only on beauty, physical appearance and body make-up, it is not real love but infatuation. Infatuation leads to a disastrous end of a relationship. When love is based mostly on sexual attraction and not in the inner beauty, it is infatuated. Real love is developed with time. It focuses on essential qualities in the person you love not only on physical beauty. It has to do with “loving somebody for whom he/she is”. Real love strengthens a man, gives new energy, increases you, makes you more creative and gives you a sense of security. Love encourages you to function at your highest level.
Infatuation has problem of choice because you may love the strength, intelligence and ability of one person and love the physical beauty and financial standard of another person. It ignores reality in relationship. It compatibility of the couple is ignored. Infatuation is filled with insecurity, jealousy and selfish possessiveness. Here is a short story about Tunde and Bukky.
Tunde was in love with Bukky. They are always fund of themselves. He loves Bukky’s beauty especially her make-ups. He loves her smooth, straight and gorgeous legs. In fact, he always likes to be with her because of her extreme beauty.
Bukky felt love. She gave her whole heart to the relationship. They got married a month after they met. They where the best couples you can ever think of. Life seems to be a bed of roses for Bukky until this tragic incidence.
Bukky was hit by a car on her way to work. She broke her leg at the cause of this accident. After she had recovered, she started practicing how to walk. Tunde has a part he supposes to play in order to aid her quick recovery. He needs to give her his support and encouragement. He needs to remind her how much he loves her. He needs to show her how he shares in her pains. Instead of all these, Tunde changed automatically. He was no longer the lovely husband Bukky got married to. He started keeping late nights. He is rarely at home with her even at weekend. He even brings some of his girl friends home. In fact, the love he thought he saw in Bukky vanished immediately the straight legs of Bukky turned to limping legs and the make-ups are no longer seen on her face. What he had for Bukky was infatuation, not real love.
Infatuation is self centered. It only makes you think of what you can gain from a relationship and not what you can out in to make the relationship better. Love seeks the happiness of the one you love.
