When it comes to getting married, nowadays, the decision of whom to marry is dependent on the individual involved and not the parents as it was in the days of our grandparents or even parents. i remember when i was dating my husband, i told my parents that i had found my one true love who had proposed to me. My parents were delighted to say the least. There was absolutely no opposition from either of our parents. I had mine quite easy but unfortunately, this is not always the case. I once heard of a couple who were so much in love but the lady’s father said they could only get married ”over his dead body”‘. A few months later, the father died and the couple got married! Sounds funny, doesn,t it. It was not easy during the waiting period as they did not want to go outside the will of the father. Oh, that period of waiting! They loved each other so much that they did not want to end the relationship, neither was any party willing to test the waters by dating other people. Anyway, all that is history as the e couple are still going strong.
Also heard of another story on all fours with the one just mentioned. The only twist is that one of the parties involved ended the relation just because of pressure. After a few months, he realised his mistake and went begging the partner for a second chance. Unfortunately, she had found someone who had swept her off her feet and according to her, did not want to break his heart. They later got married after 1 year and they are still going strong.
Most times, the intention of the parents is not to punish or disrespect their childrens”choices, it is usually borne out of love for them. As a matter of fact, parents are expected to guide their children in making decisions and not to impose their will on their kids. I have little kids of my own and i know that in a twinkling of an eye, they will come home one day to say,”dad, mum, meet the girl/boy of my dreams’ (Scary, isn’t it?). But i have just got to accept that they are all grown up. We need to let go and then let God do that which only He can do in the lives of our children. When you teach them the right path to tread, you have to let them go.
Having said all this, it is necessary that a balance is created. We need to support the kids in whatever choices they make. Though we can see beyond them, if a parent feels that the kid is making the wrong choice of spouse, he needs to inform him and tell him the reason why he thinks so. If the love struck son or daughter cannot see reason, help them to by praying that the eyes will be opened. If he/she still does not heed, then the parent should let go and let God.
