While the lot of you were having multiple orgasms over the fact that October 1st was a public holiday, your ‘leaders’ were busy robbing us blind through the award of contracts for the 50th Anniversary celebration. In my opinion, it was a terrible waste of resources and a clear example of the fact that our Government have no sense of responsibility. What are we celebrating as a ‘Nation’? The numerous religious wars? The terrible roads which have caused the deaths of numerous citizens? The rot in our education sectors? The ineptitude of PHCN? The armed robbers who were popularly refer to as the Police?
I don’t intend to bore you with the sad details… This article is inspired by the cost estimates released by the Government for the Independence anniversary celebrations. There are a number of items on the list but I will pick the most ridiculous and let’s see if we won’t have a laugh (or cry) over them…
Medicals – N25 million: This has to be a typographical error… N25million on ‘medicals’? What the hell did they do? Import doctors from Mars? Did they expect mass fainting by the invited guests? Even if they bought lorry loads of paracetamol to ‘dash’ all and sundry, it wouldn’t cost this much!
Memory stone at the Tafawa Balewa Square , Lagos – N40 million: I’ve seen the muthafucker ‘monument’ and there’s no way that thing will cost more than N30,000… It’s one bag of cement and some not-so-fancy artwork, finish! Someone’s child is going to Harvard after this…
Designing and construction of 10 monuments of the founding fathers – N80 million: Absolute rubbish! Are they telling us each monument will cost N8million to create? Wetin dem wan use make the monument? Lego? So if the unit cost of each of these monuments is N8million, why the hell did the ‘memory stone’ cost N40million? Shebi you people can see that these guys are thieves?
Designing, construction and mounting of Tower of Unity in the 36 states of the Federation – N540 million: N540million divided by 36 states amounts to N15million for each tower. Now, let’s assume that my knowledge of the English language is poor but not as bad as Obasanjo’s own. Assumption o! Shebi a ‘tower’ implies something REALLY big? Thank you. Now why the fack will a ‘tower’ cost N15million to construct and a slender cement slab will cost N40million? Shebi you are seeing? I haven’t heard of any unveiling of any tower in any of the states o! Have you?
Commissioning of the golden jubilee plaza – N10 million: According to my well-worn dictionary, Commissioning means ‘The act of granting authority to undertake certain functions.’ I guess it is safe to assume that the muthafucker Golden Jubilee Plaza has already been constructed, and no one in the Government thought it prudent to inform us of what it cost. We aren’t angry sha… My question is this; Why the fack will it cost N10million to ‘commission’ a muthafucking plaza? How much did it cost to build the thing sef?
International friendly football match and local competition – N200 million: We are still waiting for the results of the game o! N200million for football? Even if they invited the World All Stars to play against the European All Stars and they invited Mike Tyson to beat the shit out of Samuel Peters at Half Time, it wouldn’t cost THIS much! Haba!
Variety gala night and fireworks – N210 million: The last time I bought ‘knockout’, it cost N50 for a pack. Let’s assume a pack now sells for N100, no thanks to the depressing state of the economy as managed by the morons in Government. N210million= 2,100,000 packs! Someone in Government has a fireworks company… …
Designing and unveiling of the 50th anniversary logo – N30 million: Daylight robbery! Anyone with a laptop and the right software could do the job! If this was a Government that had an atom of sense, they would have made it an open competition and picked the best logo. The winner takes home N1million… Wouldn’t it have made more sense? The one they did wasn’t fine sef…
Food week – N40 million: I didn’t see any food…
Special session of the National Children Parliament – N20 million: Did they intend to pay the brats ‘sitting allowance’ like they pay the thieves in the National Assembly? Maybe they woulda traded some blows like their mentors…
Event Managers/Producers/Consultants -N120 million: Maga don pay!
Ministry of Information and Communications – N1.2 billion: Dora’s going to Dubai to buy New Jewellery soon!
Abuja Airport: Provision of Additional Parking – N1.2 billion: Unless they are planning to fit a division of heavy battle tanks and a couple of Aircraft carriers, this smells like a massive scam! When they awarded the contract for the airport, didn’t they know they would need parking space?
The total sum to be spent was eventually pruned down to N6.6 billion. That amount would pay for some significant repairs on the Shagamu-Benin expressway, fix the Murtala Mohammed International Airport, establish large farms in each geo-political zone in Nigeria and pay for the bullets to be used in executing corrupt officials. Did the Government think of that? Hell no! Omo, I’m tired joo… Make what you will of this!
