If you are reading this article, I know that this might probably not be the first time someone has asked you the question; “who are you?” No one is qualified enough to answer this question for you, but you. No one knows you more than you know yourself and as such no one can describe you accurately.
It is a well known fact that people become what they think and believe; but unfortunately, many take what others think and believe about them to be true. They complain when somebody says something that is not too pleasing to them. They try to please everybody and end up displeasing themselves and more importantly, the people they wanted to please. It is not possible to work well with everybody that comes your way; some will work with you, others will not regardless of what you do. Successful people are willing to be told not what they want to hear but what they need to hear. They love this old Chinese proverb: “Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves; they shall never cease to be amused.” John C. Maxwell confirming this said “All things being equal people will work with people they like, all things not being equal, they still will.”
A man is made or unmade by himself and himself alone. This he does by the condition of his mind per time. James Allen wrote in his book As a Man Thinketh:
“Mind is the Master-power that moulds and makes, and Man is Mind, and evermore he takes the tool of thought, and, shaping what he wills brings a thousand joys, a thousand ills:– He thinks in secret, and it comes to pass: Environment is but his Looking-glass.”
The direction to which a man’s heart is conditioned determines the direction to which he moves in life. If a man’s thoughts are always in the positive, he will eventually move upwards in the ladder of life. If his thoughts are always in the negative, then the reverse is inevitably the case. Any place a man finds himself is as a result of his mindset. The little thoughts that have accumulated in his heart over time gives him his character and as such his behaviour and position in the society. Every seed of thought planted, or allowed to fall, into the heart takes root there; and over time produces its own fruits which sooner or later becomes an act that can either move you forward or backward – good thoughts brings good fruits and bad thoughts, bad fruits. What, where, and who we spends our time with helps a lot in shaping our future.
Everything a man achieves and all he fails to achieve in life is a direct result of his personal thoughts. Henry David Thoreau said, “I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by conscious endeavour.” Many people wait to be told what to do in virtually every situation. In as much as it is good to seek advice from others, not every bit of the advice given is needed or useful. We know that no two people are truly the same. No matter how identical the twin, there is always a distinguishing character or trait that is visible with them – ask the parents or people close to them. This goes to tell us that any advice is as a result of how the person giving the advice sees the situation, which may not be the same way you seeking the advice sees the situation. The person giving the advice may not actually understand the problem the way you understand it and so may not give the accurate advice that will lead to the solution. Your success is solely your responsibility and no one will share it with you.
Theodore Roosevelt said:
“It is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled, or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs and comes short again and again, who knows the great enthusiasms, the great devotions, and spends himself in a worthy cause, who at best knows achievement and who at the worst if he fails at least fails while daring greatly so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.”
The universe does not favour the greedy, the dishonest, the vicious…although on the mere surface it sometime may appear to do so. It helps the honest, the magnanimous, and the virtuous. Achievement of any kind is the crown of efforts. You can only sustain the successes you get, from right thoughts, by watchfulness. Many have gone rapidly back into failure by allowing pride, arrogant, selfish and corrupt thoughts to take over them. It is worthy of note that the size of your sacrifice goes a long way to determining the size of your accomplishment – little sacrifice equals little accomplishment and vice versa.
People who have made one remarkable change in the world were all dreamers. They focussed their mind on their dreams. People like Columbus might have died with nobody, except their family members and neighbours, getting to know them. I want you to understand that to desire is to obtain; and to aspire is to achieve. As you dream so you shall become. A man that is ignorant – thoughtless – sees a successful man and says; “How lucky he is.” “How chance helps him in all his endeavours.” They fail to see the darkness and heartaches the successful man went through to achieve success, but simply see the results and call it “luck.” Every successful person will tell you that goal setting is critical to your success. Unfortunately, only about 3% of the population seems to know the importance of setting goals for their own life. The reasons why 97% of people do not set goals is basically based on the following:
1. They do not want to take 100% responsibility for their life.
2. They don’t understand the importance of goals.
3. They don’t know how to set goals.
4. Their fear of rejection supersedes their joy of acceptance.
5. Their fear of failure seems greater than their joy of success.
Successful people set goals in the following areas: self development, business and career, financial freedom, family life, health and energy, relationships. You should do the same.
In order to find harmony in your life, while growing and building your self confidence, you need to set goals in those 6 areas of your life and work towards achieving them. Zig Ziglar said; “A goal properly set is a goal half-way reached.” When you are clear about where you are going and what you want, you are programmed to succeed; and nothing can possibly stop you if you are focused on your goals.
I want you to think about what you are bargaining for… what have you asked ‘life’ for? Ask yourself if it is enough. Look at your life now and think about your future. Everything your heart desires… is that what you have set out to do? Or have you settled for mediocrity…?
Stop now and think about that… even jot down on a piece of paper your thoughts so you can reference them later. OK…You’re back…
What did you learn about yourself? Are you challenging yourself enough? Are you forgetting about the obstacles to get there and deciding what you want based on your dreams? The road may not be easy… but remember Peter Marshall said;
“When we long for life without difficulties, remind us that oaks grow strong in contrary winds and diamonds are made under pressure….”
Pressure is not a bad thing… stress can reap great things… challenges make us stronger and obstacles are the building blocks that will shape our success in the end. Some day, some years from now you will look back at your life. At that time, if you ask yourself, “Am I satisfied with the road I took; could I have done more?” How will you answer that? How happy or sad you will be by that answer is determined by the sacrifices you make today.
Remember, the pain is temporary, the results are forever. Advices are good, but not all are needed. It is still you who decides the ones to apply to your life. How do you spend your free times? Do you spend your times building yourself up in the positive, or the other way round? Your tomorrow is determined by the way you spend your today. You decide the things you want in your life and the ones you don’t want. What you don’t accept does not have any right or power to stay with you. Think about those things you want in your life, work towards achieving them. Pay the price today and enjoy the dividends tomorrow. Get necessary materials like books that will help you develop yourself the right way.
