Deuteronomy 6:4-8
An old Chinese proverb says “one generation plants the trees and another gets the shade. Our generation lives in the shade of many trees that were planted by our ancestors. The Bible admonishes us to teach them to your
The question that faces the ideal Christian family is whether we can plant some trees that will shade future generations from what may well be the blistering heat of anti-Christian values in an anti-Christian world. Are we planting the right kind of shade of trees, or are we leaving our children totally exposed?
The devil is fighting for the soul of our nation. The chief battleground is the home, where family unity and future generations are at stake.
All the artillery of hell has been aimed at our homes. Every shell in the artillery is a lie – negative influences that seek to erode the family structure. TV misuse, negative styles of music, early access to tobacco, alcohol, drugs, various ungodly public communication, pornography and most recently, easy access to the internet to tempt our families.
THE DEMISE OF MODERN SOCIETY
We cannot deny the fact that our culture as a whole is rapidly disintegrating, morally, ethically and spiritually.
The values of today are totally opposed to the will of God.
The Bible says that “As it was in the days of Noah, so it will be in the days of the Son of Man” (Luke 17:26; Genesis 6:5)
The world was destroyed because of its wickedness, but Noah and his eight family members were saved from the flood.
The ideal family builds the ark of safety for the family. As in the days of Lot, may the Angel of the Lord take your family out by dragging you!
– Days of Lot (Genesis 19:16,29; 2 Peter 2:6-9)
– We must build wisely, like a man building a house
What is needed is a return to the Biblical principles of parenting.
WHAT IS THE FAMILY?
– The family is the place to establish identity and security
– It is the place to teach and transmit values
– It is a sanctuary which builds an alter, opens the door of prayer and yield life’s destinies to God.
– A Christian home is a place where husband and wife submit to one another in the fear of God.
– Where parents bring up their children in God’s nurture and admonition, and where children obey their parents
– The truth is that the only real values that can save the family are rooted in scriptures
– they are biblical values, not just family values. The future of the family hangs on the success of those who are committed to the truth of scripture.
– Redemption is what is needed and that occurs at the individual level not the social level.
THE CHARACTERISTICS OF THE IDEAL FAMILY:
1. IT BUILDS ABSOLUTES
– Lay the biblical foundation for belief in the Bible as the book of Absolutes
– Lay the biblical foundation that Christ, His Word and His Spirit when obeyed, will solve any and all complicated family problems and simplify them
2. ONE IN WHICH CHILDREN ARE VALUED EQUALLY
Don’t play favourites – value them equally.
– Favouritism can be destructive in a family e.g. Joseph (Genesis 37:3)
3. WHERE PARENTS BLESS THE CHILDREN
– It is still Scriptural – Genesis – The battle between Esau and Jacob was about the blessing.
– Don’t curse your children. Don’t use careless words
– In Genesis 49 Jacob blesses his children.
4. IT IS A PLACE TO LEARN HOW TO LOVE AND FORGIVE
Joseph as an example
– Sold because of dream and imprisoned because of false accusation
– Genesis 42:13, 21-24; Genesis 44:28
– The one who is no more and torn by animals is the governor
– You will stand out
How Joseph demonstrated love and forgiveness
– The ideal family does the same (Genesis 45:1-15)
a) Will not let anyone know what brothers did
b) He said: “Come near” (v.3-4)
c) He makes them save face (v.5)
Genesis 50:20: “you meant evil but God meant it for good”
5. ONE IN WHICH DIVORCE IS NOT AN OPTION
Do not contemplate divorce, and do not use the D (Divorce) word to threaten.
Instead, use the C word — C is for covenant, compassion, commitment.
Dangers of Divorce:
– It is never over for anyone completely
– It devastates families
– It makes people wonder if being a Christian makes any difference
– It produces so much pain that the people involved may end up in mental homes
– It does not demonstrate God’s glory
– It breaks up families for generations to come
– Children’s loyalties are torn between two people they love.
6. ONE IN WHICH EACH HAS FOUND THEIR SIGNIFICANCE IN CHRIST
Healthy families are made up of healthy growing individuals who understand who they are in Christ.
– They have discovered their purpose
Your identity must be found in Christ, not in culture.
1 Peter 2:9 – But you are a chosen generation
– Healthy families are made up of healthy growing believers in Jesus Christ.
– For Christ to be at the centre of our families He must first be at the centre of our individual lives.
7. ONE THAT HAS HEALTHY TIME TOGETHER CENTRED ON GOD?S PURPOSES.
Mum and dad are to lead the family to focus on and carry out God’s purposes.
– Dad plays role as priest, prophet, king
8. WHERE CHILDREN CAN BE NURTURED
Just as we provide for the physically, food, shelter, clothing – we must nurture them spiritually too – through convincing, consistent and deliberate teaching.
9. WHERE CHILDREN ARE SEEN AS A BLESSING NOT AS A HARDSHIP
The Bible clearly teaches that children are blessed gifts from the Lord. God designed them to be a blessed.
10. WHERE PARENTING IS A JOY NOT A BURDEN
The parent’s task is not a yoke to be borne, it is a privilege to be enjoyed.
Parenting is hard only to the degree that parents make it hard by failing to follow the simple principles God sets forth.
11. WHERE PARENTS UNDERSTAND THEIR ROLE
– Where success in parenting is measured by what parents do, not by what the child does
– The true measure of success for Christian parents is the parents’ own character.
12. WHERE PARENTS UNDERSTAND THEIR INFLUENCE
– A child’s most important influence comes from parents.
Parents must involve themselves in their children’s lives enough to ensure that no other influence takes precedence.
Parents who complain that their kids rebellion are the kids’ friends’ faults must rethink and examine how they allowed it anyway.
Many will say it is unrealistic in this day and age when TV, the culture, peers, school teachers and all other factors are for a controlling interest in the typical child’s life.
Most parents have simply abdicated the parental role. They have
permitted their children’s spiritual, moral and ethical instructions to come from the television, movies, music and other children.s
May the atmosphere in our homes be such that we will raise godly children to God’s glory.
