THE MAKING OF A GOOD PASTOR
A Pastor is literally a helper, protector, feeder, guide or shepherd of a flock of God’s people. Besides the literal sense the word has now a figurative meaning and refers to the minister appointed over a congregation. This latter meaning is recognized in the translation of the King James Version. In speaking of spiritual gifts, the apostle Paul wrote that Christ “gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers” (Eph 4:11). The term pastor by this time in church history had not yet become an official title. The term implied the nourishing of and caring for God’s people. Since the ministry of the Pastor involves dealing with different classes of people and diver circumstances, he ought to conduct himself in the following ways:
a) Personal Conduct
b) spiritual conduct
c) family life
d) Social conduct
e) Conduct in the world
f) Conduct amidst pastors
g) Personal conduct and disposition
PERSONAL CONDUCT: – A wise theory describes conduct as what you are on the outside and character as what you are on the inside. It takes a lot of character to produce the right kind of conduct in today’s society. The boundaries of right and wrong are being extended almost daily in the world today, but the kingdom and word of God stand sure. A minister’s behavior in the public and in private should be seemingly the same. A minister must maintain a high level of integrity and uprightness in all facet of his endeavor.
SPIRITUAL CONDUCT: – The minister of the gospel need to be spiritually conscious, walking in the spirit and allow God to produce the fruit of the spirit in his life. Ministers are to be filled with the Holy Spirit (Eph. 5:18), walk in the Spirit (Gal. 5:25), grieve not the …. Spirit (Eph. 4:30), Quench not the Spirit (2Cor. 3:18). Just as there is a conscious dependence on the Lord Jesus for salvation, there must also be a conscious dependence on the Holy Spirit for leadership and administration of any kind and all the time.
The fullness of the spirit is essential to success in the ministry, you must take two steps to gain and maintain this control, this filling, this power of the Holy Spirit. One, you must always confess and forsake sin. Two, ask for the Holy Spirit to take over. Begin to live by faith and not by your feelings. Claim these great truths for yourself.
FAMILY LIFE: – You will never succeed in building a great church if you don’t build a great home. Love you wife even as Christ loved the church and gave His life for her. (Eph. 5:25). Ensure there is no conflict between your marriage and ministry. Magnify your wife’s good points, don’t belittle her and don’t habitually point out her weakness any more than you would have her do the same to you. Keep showing her the same love and care she enjoyed during your courtship. Let people know in little ways from the pulpit how much you love her. This will keep love-starved women away from you.
Play with your children; keep the lines of communication open. Children will open up to someone who cares, and to them, that is someone willing to spend time alone with them, doing what they enjoy. Teenagers appreciates individual attention, take them out to eat once in a while. Pray with you family, teach your family the Word of God and spiritual principles to live by. Take vacations; find common interests and hobbies the whole family can enjoy like picnics, boating etc.
SOCIAL CONDUCT:- Personal hygiene is essential, a minister is expected to take his baths daily, use deodorant whether you think he need it or not, brush your teeth, use breath mints especially after preaching. Keep your shoes polished, your clothes clean and pressed. Dress conservatively but be in style. Colors should blend, not clash. Buy good clothes which will last longer and look better. Learn about color combinations so your suits and ties go together. Don’t wear undue dressing and dress as tastefully as any executive.
Know proper etiquette, good table manners – chewing with your mouth close, avoid slurping food or drinks. Break bread then butter it, and never bite from a whole slice nor leave your spoon in the beverage while drinking it. Seat ladies before seating yourself. Watch your posture – don’t slouch. Cut and eat one piece of meat at a time. Watch the hostess and follow her example when in doubt about what to do. A pastor should feel at ease in the most elegant home.
Be prompt for appointments and don’t over stay a visit especially when it is a person’s place of employment, be brief. Pay attention when someone is talking to you, remember names, avoid criticism, arguments and interruptions at all times. Learn how to be relaxed wit people of importance. They will deeply appreciate it, don’t try to impress them because they can read it a mile away. Everyone likes someone who is real, so be youself always. Don’t avoid prominent, wealthy people. They need friends too.
CONDUCT IN THE WORLD:- We are in the world but we are not of the world. This does not imply that we should portray the attitude of holier than thou. Aloofness can be spotted and equated with snobbery. You should know your neighbors, whether they are Christians or not. Chat with them, be interested in them and help them when you can. Ministers need to be informed about politics and public education. The local PTA and school boards need to hear the voice of God through local preachers. The man of God should not hold back from using his influence in the public arena. Know the mayor, city council and schools board members. Let them know your interest, support and concern when decisions are being made.
CONDUCT AMIDST FELLOW PASTOR: – God has no enemy but the devil and sin, these should be our enemy as well and not fellow ministers. We should never allow the poison of jealousy to pollute us, we should rather rejoice at the success of other. A pastor ought to be so busy winning the lost, helping Christians and building a church that he should not have time to tear down anyone else. Fighting preachers, people or churches will only produce a sour spirit; people are fed up with fighting and fussing.
PERSONAL CONDUCT AND DISPOSITION: – Be a good cheer. “A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance….” (Prov. 15:13). Let it show. Where is the joy of the Lord? Get excited about the important things in life. There are millions looking for what we have – love joy, peace etc. Love people, they are starving for it. People will flock to you if you genuinely love them.
Be hospitable, have a good sense of humor, learn to laugh at yourself and your mistakes, don’t take yourself too seriously, a good sense of humor will save you from a breakdown. Learn to live and enjoy life.
PETER M. I. PETERS
