Most times, abusive relationships are not accidental. It’s just that people overlook signs in that particular partner. Does love really blind our eyes from seeing impending dangers that we are supposed to see in prospective partners? A guy who has raised his hands to smack you or has even smacked you once will do better when he eventually marries you. How many ladies have overlooked these traits only to get themselves battered after marriage? A lady who in the fit of rage destroys everything in sight would surely heat up her home with blind rage. Most times these things do not show up conspicuously, they just blink to warn us, but I guess the arrow of cupid at times affects our reasoning that we sweep these signs under the carpet.
I believe love should not blind a man’s reasoning to overlook abusive traits in his or her partner (Note: Please I am not saying a partner should be perfect, because such people only exist in vain imaginations of a man in fantasy). But there are some abusive tendencies that are dangerous signals, they are like icebergs with just the tips showing, but down below is a mammoth ice that can melt any relationSHIP.
Warning signs includes: –
CHEATING ON ONES PARTNER
Yes, he or she may apologize with tears that can drown the sea; but statistics have shown that most times a cheating partner will always go for the booty at any slightest opportunity. If you have noticed this in your partner and you have the intestinal fortitude to put up with this trait for long or till the person will change, then you are a rare breed. But you need to check your heart.
HOW DOES HE TREAT FEMALES
A man who has had histories of giving physical, sexual, incestuous, and emotional abuse to women, might be a leopard that may not be able to change its spotty fur. A man who raped his beautiful, sexy cousin will not be able to gird his loins later when it’s his daughter. No wonder we have cases of fathers raping their daughters. Lady, you better run if you have noticed this strange life in your man: he may cry or even wail for forgiveness, but without proper therapy, there is a chance for repetition.
HISTORY WITH CHILDREN
A man who does not love to cuddle, play with, at times baby sit when he is a single will not suddenly change to such because of fatherhood, except he wants to act it, and that would not last long. NOTE: please I am not saying this would make a man bad, but the lady should not get upset when her man only provides finances for the children, but there is no cuddle, rolling on the rug and big hugs. Men should note that a child’s confidence soar to rocket heights when he or she is touched well during formative years, more importantly by the parents.
A man who physically abuse children with canes or even mentally, will possibly not change in fatherhood. Sorry male folks, I had to stay more on the feminine side, because they ironically bear the brunt of abusive relationships. It is the lady who most times has to raise abused children, who most times do not get to heal at all. It is the woman who cries all night long soaking her pillow or wrapper with the flow. It is her beauty that is tanned off from the many batteries and mental tortures she has received. Lady, before you allow that rascal ring your heart and hand, you can still pull out if the signals you see are in red or you can simply ignore it.
